Asking for advice from an older or more experienced person does not equal failure. It can turn a bad relationship arround. It can turn an average relationship into a brilliant one.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Know when to leave
Know when to leave. If your life aims are imcompatible, if there is more pain than pleasure, then walk before the relationship destroys you.
Realize that the two
Realize that the two of you will shift and change over the years. So, even if you think you understand him, or belive you have agreements sorted, check regularly - at least once a year - to make sure that neighter of you has changes your mind.
Learn to forgive
Learn to forgive, if you know you will never forgive your partners over spmething important, then give him - and youself -a- break and start again, with someone else.
Accept the things
Accept the things that won't change. Some characteristics about your partner are there for life and you have to face that.
Learn how to negotiate
Learn how to negotiate. Each of you states what you want, then both of you work together to find a way forward.
Research sugguests you
Research sugguests you need five positive experiences to erase the memory of one negative experience. Give five hugs for each cold shoulders.
Learn how to argue
Learn how to argue well. The trick is to never say anything that you would't want to hear said to you.
Remember that moredom
Remember that moredom typically covers up anger. If you feel bored with him, ask yourself what you're angry about.
Never try to make
Never try to make your partner jealous by flirting with others. You will be tempted but the sake of long term peace, ignore it.
If the domestic work is not
If the domestic work is not divided fairly between you, it will cause friction in your relationship. Make a list of the domestic tasks and talk it through with your partner to share the work.
Money is the number
Money is the number one cause of couple conflict. Never let it come between you. For a relationship to work, you need to address your finances and work out a budget.
Reward the things
Reward the things you like and ignore what you don't like. Punishing your partner won't work. It will just make him dig his heels more.
Always keep your expectations
Always keep your expectations realistic, otherwise you are bound to get hurt.
Maintain your health and constantly
Maintain your health and constantly work on your appearance. Do not let your weight...or hair...or your complexion go hay wire. Go to a beauty salon religiously. Your partner must always feel proud to have you as his partner when you enter somebody elses'house/party.
Keep the element of surprise
Keep the element of surprise in yur relationship. Surprise your partner with little notes found in unexpected places. If he travels for work, place a loving note somewhere in their suitcase. Perhaps they have a long commute to work. If so, slip a note saying, "I love you," in their CD case where you know they will find it.
Hidden resentments poision
Hidden resentments poision a relationship; so if something bothers you, say it, Even though men avoid emotional talk they love to find solution to problems.
Arguring is normal
Arguring is normal. Too much silence means both of you are not expessing your feelings or resentments.
Learn to do the one thing
Learn to do the one thing that is most likely to restore good feelings in your relationship - giving your partner a genuine, loving and approvin1g smile.
Remember important dates
Remember important dates and give frequent gifts to each other. The size of the gift does not matter. It can be a pen or a diamond ring. It increases love.
Make him appreciate you
Make him appreciate you. DOn't wait for a spontaneous compliment, but say something good about yourself and ask for his agreement.
Men are not programmed
Men are not programmed to think like women do. They need more silence, space and internal time. So when he talks to you, really listen to him and show appreciation when he listens to you talking.
Show and tell him
Show and tell him how much you nedd him but never cling to him. Keep your dependence and independence in balance.
Both need securiety
Both need securiety, trust and comfort, Make sure all the ingredients are there to make that possible. A good relationship is built on compromise and a great deal of give and take on both sides.
Give quality time to your partner
Give quality time to your partner otherwise your relationship will not survive. Half an hour once a day or a sinner out once a month for exclusively the two of your must be in your schedules.
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